


The Epistles of @mishacollins

by jmtorres



Category: Supernatural, Supernatural RPF
Genre: Crack, Crossover, Epistolary, Meta, Multi, Twitter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-06-06
Updated: 2010-06-06
Packaged: 2017-10-09 22:56:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/92492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jmtorres/pseuds/jmtorres
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Four weeks, three thousand four hundred forty-two characters, and a hundred and seventeen goats.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Epistles of @mishacollins

Wow you guys sacrificed 117 goats to me, so I can bring back an extra one and one third people. Who do you want? Vote now.  
1:16AM June 9th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

I don't require burnt offerings. What a waste. Have a BBQ! I recommend curry goat, it's delicious. Or goat reverse cowgirl. #[mishaluvsgoats](http://twitter.com/search?q=%23mishaluvsgoats)  
9:22PM June 8th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

#[goatsformisha](http://twitter.com/search?q=%23goatsformisha) apparently getting censored. Damn you Mr. Twitter! Try #[mishaluvsgoats](http://twitter.com/search?q=%23mishaluvsgoats). Because I do.  
10:17AM June 8th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Midnight Detroit time. Between Tuesday and Wednesday. WTH time zone is Detroit in? We've been driving 14 hours.  
7:43AM June 7th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Only 50 goats needed, there's like 60,000 of you, so no problem! Network via #[goatsformisha](http://twitter.com/search?q=%23goatsformisha) to set up community sacrifices.  
8:19PM June 6th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

The devil says he will send me back if I can prove I am worshipped in my home universe by sacrifice of goats. Midnight Tuesday okay?  
8:17PM June 6th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Kitten was alive until we fed it to @[tallwinchester](http://twitter.com/tallwinchester). That guy's a fiend for kitten blood.  
4:32PM June 5th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Off to kill God with an ice pick, a ball of twine, and a kitten. Back later.   
1:57AM June 5th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

I knew I should have paid better attention to that reality snuff thing. WTF is a windiego and how do I stop it from EATING ME?  
8:13PM June 2nd via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Damn it when did @[tallwinchester](http://twitter.com/tallwinchester) start reading my twits? He's so pissed off he kicked me out of shotgun. Doesn't he know he's my minion now?  
4:48PM May 30th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Duh, of course angels have tentacles. Cass needs the coat to hide them all so he can go buy burgers without the cashiers noticing.  
4:42PM May 30th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Gabriel slid his suckered tentacles up Sam's ass. Sam moaned as Gabriel deposited his eggs. He couldn't believe he was getting off on this.  
4:26PM May 30th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Hey, I read a fic where this worked for Sam. Anyone know how to kill a hobgoblin? I'll write slash mpreg tentacle porn, pairing your choice.  
5:06AM May 28th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

@[nurubyfan](http://twitter.com/nurubyfan) no, she was pegging Dean. Dunno why Sam has a bug up his butt about it. You'd think if anyone would be sore...  
3:19AM May 25th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/) in reply to [nurubyfan](http://twitter.com/nurubyfan)  


* * *

How do you say "donkey anus" in Enochian? Would google it but Sam banned me from the laptop. He hasn't forgiven me for the Ruby pegging fic.  
3:02AM May 25th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

@[jumblejim](http://twitter.com/jumblejim) I'll have to find the link again when I get home, all the RPF here is Dean/Sam. But they love you too. No accounting for taste.  
11:26PM May 24th via web in reply to [jumblejim](http://twitter.com/jumblejim)  


* * *

Oh I am totally on the top. Except when I'm on the bottom.  
11:17PM May 24th via web  


* * *

Yes we ARE hawt. Even her. What's with all the haters?  
11:12PM May 24th via web  


* * *

@[angelloverbaby](http://twitter.com/angelloverbaby) no, Dean/Cass fic, not RPS. Unless the idea of me reading RPS bothers you, in which case, Misha/Jensen/Genevieve/@[jumblejim](http://twitter.com/jumblejim).  
11:08PM May 24th via web in reply to [angelloverbaby](http://twitter.com/angelloverbaby)  


* * *

In Cass's pockets: 22 burger wrappers, dead minutes card, bottle of aspirin, 4 condoms (ribbed), ball of twine, 2 spoons (1 used), 1 kitten.  
11:06PM May 24th via web  


* * *

Cass's trenchcoat is magical in its own right but has never been worn by the pope.   
10:52PM May 24th via web  


* * *

Now I understand why everyone flips when they get Kripked. You'd think fanfic come to life would be exciting, not uncomfortable and wet.  
10:43PM May 24th via web  


* * *

Dean also freaked out by my facial hair. While it is not a full Spock beard, I am concerned he suspects my plans for world domination.   
5:20PM May 24th via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Seriously people just get out your DVDs and watch the last scene of 401.   
3:24PM May 22nd via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

No, I will not hand out the angelphone number so you can listen to me say Castiel Angel of the Lord. Who do you think I am, @[levarburton](http://twitter.com/levarburton)?  
3:17PM May 22nd via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Dean is officially pursuit. Yes, exactly like that. Get your minds in the gutter, people.   
2:05PM May 22nd via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Fixed Cass's voicemail so it actually has his name. Used my own voice to throw off pursuit.  
12:37PM May 22nd via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

I can, of course, dodge bullets. Salt's a little harder to duck. Stings like a mf too.  
6:22PM May 21st via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Dean has like fourteen guns on his person alone. Of course he can shoot at me.  
5:38PM May 21st via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

It's like canon vs cannon. It's a phenomennon if it can shoot at you.   
5:19PM May 21st via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

There was a comet crossing Jupiter or some other cosmological phenomennon and I ended up in the impala explaining why my name is not Jimmy.  
5:03PM May 21st via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

It is not a prop. Dean bought it for him at a gas station but Cass upgraded it.   
4:27PM May 21st via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

@[samlicker](http://twitter.com/samlicker) Of course it's fully functional. Are you implying the angelphone needs viagra?  
4:08PM May 21st via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/) in reply to [samlicker](http://twitter.com/samlicker)  


* * *

Yes, i am twitting from Cass's phone. Yes, the angelphone IS awesome.  
4:02PM May 21st via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

PS did Cass go to con for me? Did anyone think to tell him they were keeping God in their back pocket? or bra? pics of the groping, please!  
3:49PM May 21st via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Sorry I was away, lots of "out of service" errors-i don't have interdimensional on iphone. But the angelphone works! Take that, Steve Jobs!  
3:45PM May 21st via [Ubertwitter](http://ubertwitter.com/)  


* * *

Con sent scary cosplayer to pick me up at O'Hare. <http://tinyurl.com/2dc8mcv> Plastic surgery to get Ackles lips I understand, but frackles?  
2:10PM May 13th via [Echofon](http://www.echofon.com/)  


* * *

**Author's Note:**

> Also posted on dreamwidth: <http://jmtorres.dreamwidth.org/1479863.html>


End file.
